"I'm Thinking of Joining the Military..."

This is a question I'm asked all too often. Volumes of friends and strangers alike have bombarded me with question after question about what the military has to offer, what it's like, if it's worth it, etc. And rightfully so, I might add--if someone wants information about something, they should go to someone who knows about it. But when I respond to these interrogatives, I usually throw them a novel of knowledge they really need to digest before making any decision about service. This is because something like the military is no small ordeal and needs to be afforded every consideration before joining.

So, you're thinking of joining the military, hmm? "What a noble choice!", "You're so brave!", "Good for you!" is what everyone who doesn't know what the military is like is going to tell you if you inform them of your interest in serving. However, I'd wager that the majority--say, maybe 6 or 7 out of 10 people our age serving right now--will tell you the same thing, "It's not all that great, don't do it if you don't have to."

I would be flat out lying if I said I disagree.

We're all aware of the dismal state of the economy. Things aren't looking all that stellar. The offers to pay for education and all those benefits sure sound good. You'll get to travel, you'll get to do things 99% of the population will never ever do. You'll get to wear a uniform, tout your country's name proudly, and spread the glory of American democracy to the world. Sounds great right?

Here's what you need to factor in: the military does not exist to provide you with education, health benefits, or any other benefits. Those are what the military uses to entice enlistment, it's what they're offering in return for your service. What the military exists for is to enact and enforce the will of the United States government. That is all there is to it. That is why it exists. Sure, they tell us all sorts of different reasons why we do what we do in order to manufacture consent, but in all reality, the military is just the dog on the end of the chain, and the entity holding that chain is the government. That's all you are when you're in: a dog on the end of a chain. Recognize that fact first and foremost. The government will send you places you have no business being in to carry out its will over things that are neither life-threatening nor threatening to our way of life. 

The only reason countries as large as the U.S. pursue military action is to ensure the safety of its national interests which are almost entirely economic or neocolonial/imperialistic. Countries like the U.S. don't go to war to topple dictators or remove evil people from power. There's always an ulterior motive that you don't see for everything the government says they're doing. Elaborate public relations campaigns will tell you quite the different story, but that's mostly what they are--stories. I could provide examples but it would be a waste of time because all you need to know is that there are reasons the government does what it does that we as the public will never be aware of because we're too lazy and confused to put two and two together.

And as for those benefits? Yeah, that's all subject to change. I was in just over a year when they cut Tuition Assistance, one of the largest and most fundamental education benefits offered and probably the main reason most people join. The military changes every single day and your benefits might, too. Nothing is ever guaranteed, no matter what they put on paper. No matter what.

Another thing you need to realize about the armed forces is that it's an institution. You go in as you are and come out differently. That's all there is to it. No one stays the same. The purpose of Basic Training in and of itself is to make you capable of systematically killing another human being. That's going to change you as a person. They break you down and build you back up the way they want you. No matter how acutely aware of their training tactics you are, you have to play by the rules to pass the training and as a result, the resocialization takes hold very effectively and lasts for your lifetime. This is why you hear about people never really quite 'coming back' from the military. So if you're willing to deal with the unpredictable changes you will undergo, you might be alright. But just know that you will change. You might not notice it yourself but I guarantee you that every single person who knew you decently before you leave will notice it within an hour of talking to you after you come back or graduate the training.

Human beings are odd creatures. We can be told a thousand times that something is going to happen, but until it actually happens, we don't really believe that it will. This is no more evident in the military than anywhere else. You need to realize that once again, you and the military exist to fight and kill other human beings for the interests of the government. And until you are confronted with that reality, until you come face to face with taking another human's life, until you can't hide from the fact that someone may raise their weapon and shoot at you, until all that happens, you have absolutely no idea what you're in for. You really don't. And that alone will change you forever. For some people, it will break them. You can watch as many war movies as you want, play as many military shooter video games as you want, and read as many harrowing combat accounts as you want--you will never know or understand until you're in the situation yourself.

I am not ashamed of my service, but I'm not proud in the patriotic sense--I'm proud of the things that I and my brothers achieved, but not in the 'doing Uncle Sam's work' kind of way. I don't regret that I served because I grew a lot and I went to places that most people will never go to in their entire lives, did things that people would jump at the chance to do, and met some truly incredible people--friends that will stick with me for the rest of my life, formed bonds that are absolutely irreplaceable. I learned some incredible things as well. But I decided that, having seen what we do, and having been under the iron fist of military leadership, that I no longer wanted to be in an environment where good men and women are put in danger at the behest of men and women in suits who make over 100k a year for reasons that are not worth dying or killing for.

And for the record, I went in with a very idealistic frame of mind. I fully believed in the cause, I bought the patriotic bullcrap entirely, hook, line, and sinker. I realized pretty quickly it's all garbage. Realizing I had been duped and that everything I believed in going in was a lie filled me with a rage that hasn't wavered for a single second. There is nothing quite as infuriating and intense as the feeling of betrayal. So if you join the military, at least know that all the propaganda they tell you, all the glorious patriotism you're going to be honoring--all of that is nothing but lies and promises to keep your boots moving unquestioningly forward.

Among many other things, I've learned that your civilian friends are always going to be stellar and amazing, but there is no bond which is quite as strong, immutable, unique, and unbreakable as a military friendship. The countless hours on post, the freezing nights in the foxholes, the shared pre-packaged field rations (MREs to all my military buddies out there), the talks that leave no stone unturned where you walk away knowing a person's entire life story--these are things that you simply don't experience in the civilian world. But just as the military forms these amazing bonds, it takes them away given that you 'rotate' posts so often. There is little else as sobering and disheartening as saying goodbye to the buddy you've laughed at scores of comedy films with, shared hundreds of meals with, shared a foxhole with, spotted at the gym every day for the last year, etc. That goodbye is a bitch, frankly. So know that. You will make the best friends of your lives but you will one day say goodbye and possibly never see them again because life will inevitably carry you to different places.

So think long and hard about whether you really want to devote your life or a large chunk of it to the military. The minimum enlistment is four years active duty and four years reserve/inactive, so eight years total. You have to serve that unless you get kicked out--which you don't want to happen--or unless you volunteer to separate, which they only make an option once a year, and only if they're overmanned. Four years is a long time. You can miss a lot in that time. The world moves on without you. Your friends back home forget about you. "Out of sight, out of mind" was never more apt. I can tell you that when you're at base thousands of miles away and you are forced to miss the funeral of a friend who took their own life, you will be carrying baggage around from that for years to come. Like I said, you can miss a lot in just a little time. Think of how many birthdays and holidays you'll miss out on. Think of the time you could spend with family members that will never be repaid to you. Your time is priceless. Don't sell yourself short on it.